Long-time Friends

You remember that guy in your 11th grade American Lit. class? You know, the one who used to write silly limericks about the teacher with the large glasses and bad breath. The one who made you laugh until you got detention for "disruptive behavior." Where is he now? Why aren't you still in touch?

This past weekend I was in Greenville with friends from college. We all graduated in 2000, eight years ago. While hanging out with the Greenville gang, it struck me that I've kept in touch with these guys but lost contact with so many others. What really stuck with me was the thought that, back then, I spent less time quantity-wise with these guys than with many others. What was it that kept us connected while so many others have been lost?

After my second year at Mountainview, my good friends Mike and Heather left Indonesia for good. The last night I saw Mike, he said, "I love you, but I'm terrible with email. I may not write often, but that doesn't mean that you're not in my heart or on my mind." And, judging by my own life experiences, that's true for many of us. I love and pray for many of my old friends -- Joe, Candida, Corinne, Tom, Mandy, Dwight -- but I certainly have done a miserable job at keeping close ties with them. In fact, on this trip to the States I learned from a friend of a friend that some of these people who reside in my heart are now married, have kids, are divorced, have dealt with personal loss, or are no longer in the States. Joy and sorrow ensues. Guard against the guilt.

What keeps us in contact with some and not with others? I'm not really sure. There are many factors to it. But I do know that when I see someone from the past, my heart swells and my palms sweat. And, often, we pick up, not from where we left off (because we're not the same idiots we were back then), but, rather, we pick up with a sense of connectedness that time cannot wipe out. If anything, time and experience adds to the beauty of the reunion.

By the by, if any of you can explain the sweaty palms, I'd sure appreciate it. Makes shaking hands a real issue.